Unfortunately, sex is portrayed in popular movies, TV shows, books without consent written in to the process. Although the viewer is generally meant to assume that all parties involved have consented beforehand, by leaving that vocalization of boundaries and desires out, viewers get the wrong idea about what healthy sex should look and feel like.
And although we understand porn isn't necessarily sex education, sometimes we do what we watch on porn because we thing its' real. Overall, this ambiguity can lead to potentially harmful or distressing sexual interactions and confusion about how a person should vocalize their dissatisfaction with their partner. Our new writer, Rachel Colias, is here to talk more about how a new Kickstarter called, "Consent porn" is really, really hot and you should support it!
* * *
Daniel Copulsky is a fellow Chicago consent advocate and has started his own sex-positive project. His Kickstarter project? It's called, "Consent Porn: Collected Erotica Featuring Consent". Its plans? Deliver exactly what it implies; hot, written erotica that includes the consent process. Part of this process, as outlined in Daniel’s Kickstarter description, includes characters in the erotica who, “talk about what they want, negotiate their limits, discuss safer sex, set boundaries with their partners, use safewords, and check in with each other.”
Daniel’s project is one GetLusty for Couples is especially excited about. We think consensual, amazing sex is really hot. However, some porn can be very vague--to actively crossing-boundaries. And that's not hot. We do appreciate others' interest in things like 'gang rape porn' but that's completely not our thing. (Although, before and after such porn filmings, they have chats with the stars to confirm their consent.)
By publishing and creating more consent-based pornography and erotica we chip away at the current rape culture we exist in; we stand firmly with those who understand and spread the necessity of clear consent within all types of sexual interactions and relationships.
Interested in integrating more vocalized, communicative consent into your own sex life? Fill in the blanks of this awesome consent form (to the left) with your partner. Not only is this communication hot in itself, but it also encourages people in real-life situations to better communicate their own needs or discomfort. Daniel explains that his project will not be exclusive to any one type of erotica or sexual relationship.
If this is the kind of project you’d like to help ensure sees it all the way to publication and completion, there are a few ways you can help out. Daniel’s pledge goal is $5,000 and the deadline is Thursday November 1, 2012. This money will go towards website promotion, printing, paying authors, and the publication process. If you donate $25.00 or more you even get your own printed copy of the final book!
If you don’t want to donate money, but still wish to contribute Daniel and his project members are currently accepting erotica submissions. Have other ideas? They also still need people, especially with experience, to help them with “Publicizing the project, soliciting and reading submissions, proofreading, editing, designing the book and website, getting the anthology into stores, shipping orders, organizing readings, and thinking of other good stuff we ought to do.”
We love Daniel’s project and we definitely want to see its completion. If you'd like to contribute in any way or just learn more about the project, you can find his Kickstarter at this link.
This article was written by Rachel Colias. She’s currently getting her bachelors in English and Women’s and Gender studies and feels especially passionate about advocating for the importance of consent and communication.
Her hobbies include shopping for new vibrators, playing roller derby, and getting tattoos her mom doesn't approve of. When she’s not writing for GetLusty for Couples or doing homework, she’s playing with her bearded dragon Terrance and you can generally find her reading comic books with her loving boyfriend of six years or eating pizza and watching Netflix. You can find and follow her Tumblr blog here! E-mail her at editorial@getlusty.com.
